I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize