i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
PS: I just woke up from my shower
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
