her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize