the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
