I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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