I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
