Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
its not stalking. its research.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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