it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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