Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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