ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
