how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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