The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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