Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
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