I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
