So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
