I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Randomize
