Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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