You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize