I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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