OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Randomize
