Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
