i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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