hell yes lets make some ravioli
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
