If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
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Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
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I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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