Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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