Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
