Texts From Last Night

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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  what does that even mean?

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.

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  (610): yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night. (215): what does that even mean? (610): you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life. http://tfl.nu/owon
  Replies (36) Good night (5586) Bad night (784)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  someone owes me an orgasm

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  (406): someone owes me an orgasm http://tfl.nu/u7wj
  Replies (17) Good night (1660) Bad night (3408)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink

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  (410): when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink http://tfl.nu/mfes
  Replies (14) Good night (1317) Bad night (4161)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???

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  (609): i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on??? http://tfl.nu/8had
  Replies (51) Good night (1095) Bad night (4984)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.

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  (407): the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever. http://tfl.nu/psk0
  Replies (14) Good night (6142) Bad night (679)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.

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  (330): you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there. http://tfl.nu/1912
  Replies (7) Good night (6289) Bad night (1227)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.

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  (815): Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long. http://tfl.nu/t49w
  Replies (7) Good night (3766) Bad night (1019)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.

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  (515): you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation. http://tfl.nu/yqu2
  Replies (8) Good night (3797) Bad night (1042)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.

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  (203): what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame. http://tfl.nu/l6g2
  Replies (9) Good night (1405) Bad night (1098)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  "It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.

  (1-901): View more from Tennessee

  You have found the Promised Land of friend zones

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  (901): "It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome. (1-901): You have found the Promised Land of friend zones http://tfl.nu/0f4w
  Replies (3) Good night (1352) Bad night (782)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.

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  (520): She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup. http://tfl.nu/0yof
  Replies (2) Good night (761) Bad night (440)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...

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  (775): You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper... http://tfl.nu/b471
  Replies (5) Good night (497) Bad night (1212)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong

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  (585): yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong http://tfl.nu/twjt
  Replies (4) Good night (748) Bad night (389)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment

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  (703): I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment http://tfl.nu/m0k3
  Replies (0) Good night (314) Bad night (668)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?

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  (+44): So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew? http://tfl.nu/2jti
  Replies (2) Good night (454) Bad night (148)

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