Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
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Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
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You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...