I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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