Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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