His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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