Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
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