I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
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At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
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I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.