Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.