Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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