Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
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i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
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At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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