so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
