New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I love you. Go after that dick
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
