4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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