Texts From Last Night

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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.

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  (250): i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay. http://tfl.nu/ht4h
  Replies (15) Good night (6655) Bad night (634)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.

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  (304): i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas. http://tfl.nu/zwmj
  Replies (19) Good night (4277) Bad night (1364)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...

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  (603): hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1... http://tfl.nu/ehgf
  Replies (21) Good night (8632) Bad night (1179)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.

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  (724): He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever. http://tfl.nu/8ol6
  Replies (6) Good night (3428) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.

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  (201): The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card. http://tfl.nu/lm1u
  Replies (15) Good night (2802) Bad night (851)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you

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  (612): Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you http://tfl.nu/lizp
  Replies (7) Good night (2789) Bad night (844)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room

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  (719): Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room http://tfl.nu/c34s
  Replies (5) Good night (3380) Bad night (933)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well

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  (518): we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well http://tfl.nu/pd1v
  Replies (5) Good night (1405) Bad night (579)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!

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  (904): All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted! http://tfl.nu/btgq
  Replies (8) Good night (2046) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school

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  (912): It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school http://tfl.nu/xr6r
  Replies (9) Good night (914) Bad night (1914)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.

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  (701): Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single. http://tfl.nu/d9fj
  Replies (2) Good night (882) Bad night (942)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on

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  (405): Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on http://tfl.nu/n0jv
  Replies (4) Good night (243) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (+27): View more from South Africa

  His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often

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  (+27): His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often http://tfl.nu/sl6l
  Replies (1) Good night (994) Bad night (298)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me

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  (240): I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me http://tfl.nu/mac9
  Replies (3) Good night (680) Bad night (286)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.

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  (775): He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it. http://tfl.nu/09j3
  Replies (9) Good night (665) Bad night (422)

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