Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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