I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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