Porn is love you can see.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
