just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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