I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
