i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize