Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
