If i could tip my vagina, i would.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
