We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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