Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
it's like heaven, but drunker
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
