you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
do herpes really smell.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
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