Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize