You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Randomize
